Well folks, it's official....
I'm crazy!
Nah, really though, I just have been clinically diagnosed with ADHD as well as moderate obsessive compulsive disorder; OCD for short, for those of you out there that don't follow the acronyms. Heck, I'm in education where practically EVERYTHING'S an acronym. Anyway, yes, I've been prescribed Zoloft (today's my 4th day): NOT for depression. I'm far from that, but Zoloft also helps with increasing seratonine levels in the brain in order to curb anxiety and its side effects. And, boy, have I been anxious and touchy lately! (Just read my last post. What a train wreck I am sometimes--jeez!)
However, I know this is a busy time of year and everyone's stressed, but I haven't done a very good job in the past half year channeling my anxieties/frustrations in the right way. Hence, my nervousness, obsessive cleaning, and yelling/crying in class. Agh. I've been afraid I'd come to this point; you know, where my obsessive, extremely order-prone personality comes crashing head-on into my extremely unpredictable day-to-day, "nothing-ever-happens- like-it's-supposed-to" career path. BAM. So maybe this 'scrip will help. It'll probably take about two weeks to be effective, though. Hmm. Too bad it can't start working before I clean my "already clean" house like mad this weekend for our family Christmas. Oh well. ;/
I've always been afraid of becoming dependent on meds (like so many people I know--people in my family, unfortunately--are), so I fought this for a while. I hate even taking Tylenol and don't EVEN try to get me to take antibiotics--unless I'm dying. As a matter of fact, a student of mine MADE THE APPOINTMENT for me w/ the family nurse practitioner I saw. I know her personally so she made me feel really good about my decision.
Anyone who knows me/interacts with me on a daily/weekly basis knows my "ticks." I pick up stuff/trash off of my floor impulsively. My room is straightened every day (desks in straight rows), I HATE it when people move my stapler, vacuuming daily is NOT an option: it's a must!, dust is consistently wiped from surfaces, I will stand in front of a framed print on the wall for minutes just getting it level, then a half hour later do it again, blah, blah; the list goes on. Some people notice more than others, and it's only in MY environments (my house, my classroom) that I become obsessive. Your house can be a wreck and it really doesn't bother me, but my house, on the other hand....I cannot work until the environment is just right. So yeah, my house does stay really clean, but that cleanliness has been coming at a high price. I've been sleeping around only four hours per night on weekdays. Granted, I'm not tired when I'm at school (just crabby :)), but when I get home (usually after working at MEC til eight or nine), then I CRASH. But then I wake up at about 11:30 and will find something to do til long after midnight. Not a good habit, so I'm trying to break it now.
Learned some really wierd things about me here, didn't ya? We all have our ways of hiding our idiosyncrasies from others. Still, I hope I've not weirded anyone out about me. What exactly is "normal," anyway????
One other really great thing came out of all this as well; several of my seniors chipped in together and got me a spa package over $100 at Serenity in the Mountains in Blue Ridge. It's reeeaaallly awesome, from what everyone that's been there has told me. What a great gift!
Hmmm, what else? Oh! AP kids: I'll save our Godiva chocolate 'til we get back in January and then we'll indulge in it. MMMMmmmmm...Chocolate...(as Homer Simpson would say!) Now, Angela; there's your other Christmas present. Stupid apostrophe!
Dakota; swell job at the talent extravaganza today! You were jolly! :p
Word of advice to everyone traveling down Murphy Hwy. here in Bville this holiday season: watch out for the Dodge Charger w/ the State Patrol driving. He WILL pull you over. I KNOW. Ughh. $66. Ask me in person and I'll tell you all about it.
In the meantime, I hope all of you out there in blogland have a super holiday...and don't forget to watch the "A Christmas Story" 24-hour marathon on TBS on Christmas Eve! Love that movie!
6 comments:
yeah, i have problems with sleep, too. i normally go to sleep at sometime around three or four in the morning, wake up to the alarm at six, snooze until 6:45, and then roll out of bed to go to school...on weekends, i generally either go to angela's house (where i stay up until five and wake up at eight), or stay at my house and go to sleep at six and wake up at about ten. so, needless to say, i'm not always chipper all the time...i don't know why i stay up so late...i mean, i really like to sleep. my dreams are INTERESTING!!! i mean, completely awesome. no nightmares, ever, and all in wonderful, too-real-for-reality colors. i think it's mainly that i get caught up in so many stories...they flash through my brain and i have to play them until they run out (or i'm totally engrossed in some book or another...or guitar hero...). either that, or i tend to drift and all manner of philisophical things pop up, just to keep me occupied all night...yep...not much sleep for stephanie.
have a happy holiday, mrs. krieger! and try not to clean the finish off your floors and counters, okay?
Gracias for the kind words on a subpar performance. Haha.
Anyway, hopefully this break will be good for everyone, and we'll all come back refreshed and ready to get cracking on those awesome essays and multiple choice!
...Right.
Anyway, hope your break goes well!
Adios!
Dear ApJen,
I've decided that I will call you this, because it seems that you and I share far too many things in common :):) hehehe. Anyhow, you know my opinions about meds---like you, I avoid them at all costs. But I've been on zoloft for 3 years now, and let me tell you, it does help with the OCD, depression, and anxiety. But we've talked.
I had the weirdest dream last night. I dreamed that my mom was Lisa Kudrow, and that she had died from a small cell cancer or something like that. Odd, huh?
Hugs to you!
I didn't know you were THAT crazy.
Got your card yesterday--love the stickers! Thank you.
Merry Christmas!
Urgh... at least you can use medicines. Even if I want to I can't because they stop working far faster than they should. For example, I had my toncils out last week and they prescribed a solution of hydrocodone and tylenol and IT STOPPED WORKING yesterday! No, it didn't even just stop working; it made my throat feel worse so I completely stopped taking it and now I'm just downing childrens advil and motrin (disgusting). Oh yeah, and I'm not sleeping really. Just some naps.
Anyway, sorry about the rant. It's really not bad at all. I'm having a lot of fun just hanging out and playing guitar hero. Ah well, merry Christmas and my blog will be full of more toncil tales (just warning you).
toodles! (I hate that word. It makes me sound like Patty Simcox from Greece)
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